Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Hungry, Hungry Hippos is kind of a disturbing game. That's all I have to say about that.
I believe I've misplaced some blame. So I blamed my achy knees that I feel each time I climb the stairs to my apartment on racquetball. I believe there's a sneakier culprit that should shoulder the blame... THE HILL!!! There's a steep (but not very long) hill that we must climb to get to school and descend to return home from school where I'm currently living. I think that's what is really killing my knees! And it's actually the descent that is doing it, I believe. Sneaky devil.
There's a Biggest Loser... but what about "The Biggest Gainer?" No, I'm not talking about gaining weight, but muscle. I have to admit that despite never before watching the Biggest Loser, I actually got sucked into this season. It's pretty cool to watch people work that hard to become more healthy. It's made me think that there should be a similar show where they take scrawny people (like someone you may all know) and turn them into freaky-beefy body-builders. Just a thought. Ok, bye.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
A site for the civil rights conscious.
A cool site for the insanely bored and feeling slightly artsy.
A site for the obnoxious.
A site for the bored.
A site for the curious.
Just a few. The end. Bye.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Day 2: Jeff wakes up at 11:30 and barely makes it on time to his class at noon. He turns in his paper. He gives a presentation in his Urban American History class. He's so out of it that he doesn't even have time to think about how haggard he must look. He comes home and kills an incredible amount of time. Instead of working on the paper due for Urban American History he goes to a birthday party campfire in the canyon and has fun, but remains stressed about said second paper. He comes home and does some research for this paper... but very little. His friend Kelsie comes over and watches shows online with him and tries to get him to work, but to no avail. Jeff does find many quotes for his paper, but has 0% of his paper done. Jeff finds himself having about his third blood-sugar crash of the week and determines to go get late-night foodat about 3:30 a.m.. Burger King is only serving breakfast. Jeff has now made a habit of eating breakfast before going to bed. Jeff's transition to nocturnaldom is almost complete. Jeff sends Kelsie home at about 5 a.m. and decides to go to bed and finish the paper the next day. His mental state is that of meatloaf.
Day 3: Jeff wakes up at noon and takes a shower to wake himself up a bit. Jeff locks himself in his room and feverishly completes his 8-10 page paper that is due by 5 p.m. that day. Jeff leaves his room once to grab the first thing he sees that is edible in the kitchen. It happens to be a jar of peanut butter that is accessed by a large spoon. Jeff consumes a scoop and continues blazing away at said paper. Jeff sees that there is about a half hour left before his deadline and he's only finishing up the conclusion to his paper. Jeff completes his Chicago Manual of Style footnotes in the fastest time he could imagine any human being compiling them. He saves said paper at exactly 5 p.m. and waits frantically as his printer spits it out. Jeff has no time to even read over it once for errors and staples it like he's saving his life. He doesn't have time to do anything else and runs out of his apartment at nearly a full sprint. He doesn't change pace until he reaches the institute building. He continues moving at a rapid pace to Old Main where he prays (literally) that his professor is still waiting in his office. He runs up the stairs past a feverish conversation about the LDS church and its truthfulness or not. At 5:08 pm he finds that the door of the History Department Office is closed. He remembers that there is an alternate way into the office. He finds the door opened and enters. Panting like a madman he sees his professor sitting in his office. With slowly-fading terror on Jeff's face he hands his paper to his professor who says, " Thanks. You're lucky, I was just shutting down my computer to leave." All Jeff can pull together to say between breaths is, "Thank you for still being here." After a couple more small-talk statements Jeff rides the elevator to the first floor. He walks past the before-mentioned conversation still going strong and contemplates how he could tell the bearded-man arguing against the truthfulness of the LDS church that he had just had a small miracle that allowed him to get his paper in on time. As he strolls home, Jeff curses the Logan air as his lungs are burning and he begins having coughing fits. Jeff's mental state at that point is that of cottage cheese. Jeff decides that he needs relaxation time and goes to Wingers with his friend Kelsie and then plays card games at her apartment with his good pal Ty as well. Jeff has fun and comes home and falls asleep at about 3:30 a.m..
Day 4 (today): Jeff wakes up at 1 p.m. and finds as many ways to distract himself from working on paper number 3 as possible. He goes to the store with Spencer and watches the NFL Draft for the first time in his life. He finally resolves to work on said third paper. He goes to the library until 11:15 p.m. and finds three books with valuable information. He finds many sources for his paper on censorship in the People's Republic of China for his Chinese History class. Despite all of this work, he still has yet to open a Word document intended to be the file that will contain his final paper. He's resolved to keep working on said censorship paper until at least 5 a.m.. At about 3 a.m. he sees his camera and gets distracted. He takes the following pictures:
and logs into his blog. His mental state is that of orange juice as he dances to wicked awesome music and writes in the third person about himself.
On my way to mental vapor! See you later!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
“Ignorance is bliss, or mandatory in some cases.”
Sandy Schaefer’s quote, “Ignorance is bliss, or mandatory in some cases,” is an interesting addition to a very popular cliché. I wouldn’t say that it’s extremely profound, but it is applicable to some of life’s situations. There are times that ignorance would be considered mandatory. There are questions that we ask others in order to gauge their opinions, but sometimes they just have to leave us in the dark.
The instance that best validates Schaefer’s opinion are when questions like, “Do I look good today?' are asked. Often even the worst looking people in the world will receive a positive answer to this question. It’s required that we simply leave things be every so often. If there is something that a person just can’t change, then I think it’s better to simply make them feel better about it. Would you ask a zebra to change its stripes?
There are times when Schaefer’s words are applicable, but they don’t necessarily stir any great life changing epiphanies to me. You can’t always fill everyone in about everything. But that’s something that we learn as children. Kids will often inadvertently insult people by stating the truth. My niece recently told me I had a funny haircut. Not to say that hurt me, but I could definitely see someone becoming upset by that. Perhaps this quote is most valuable for reviewing a lesson we all may have forgotten.
So, there ya go! There's a bit of Jeff-Thought from high school. Hopefully future reads will be even more interesting. :)
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
There's an evil laundry conspiracy all around college campuses. I'm convinced that all the apartment managers with laundry rooms in their apartment complexes and the nearby laundromats collude together to
gyp what little money we have out of us when we do our laundry. NO DRYERS EVER WORK! Fortunately my complex has ONE dryer that actually does what it's supposed to do. EVERY LAST OTHER DRYER I'VE USED WITHIN A 1 MILE RADIUS OF USU HAS NOT WORKED! Right now I have to put on wet socks every morning because I refuse to spend any more of my quarters on this evil ploy! Grumble.
I like life. I enjoy living. It's good. Dying doesn't sound great yet. I'm ok with still living. Ok, bye.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
The Bad: My mom bought some store brand English Muffins that tasted TERRIBLE and I've never been able to eat one again. (Aside from above-mentioned mmm-ness.)
The Funny: My old dog Cirrus used to LOVE bread. We'd give it to her all the time. When my mom bought the nasty English Muffins I tried to give Cirrus one. Instead of wolfing it down very quickly (she did EVERYTHING really fast) she went to the corner of the room and tried to bury it in the carpet. She was a very special dog.
"The Stares:" The other day I said that I had "the stares" and someone told me they'd never heard it called that before. That quite surprised me. I've called it that my whole life. I get "the stares" practically anytime I'm tired (which is a majority of my life) and they can sometimes create fairly awkward situations. One time I got them at church and I was staring at a wall and thinking about something else. (Why would I be thinking about a wall?) Anyway, about .02° off of where I was staring was a girl that I had dated for a while and was no longer dating. When I snapped out of my glazed-over state, I saw that she was staring at me with an confused look on her face thinking that I was staring at her. Oops. Those darn stares.
The Stairs: Everytime I walk up the stairs to my apartment I can feel racquetball. It's apparently murder on my knees. This contributes to me feeling like an 80 year old man. Along with watching Game Show Network and CNN all the time. I probably have seen more commercials for power-chairs and AARP than any of my peers.
Water: I want a drink of water. The end. K, bye.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Use the information and directions below to join the game.
Game ID: STOCK-O-MANIA
Game Password: randomania
- Open this link and read the competition summary:
- Click on the 'Join Game' link.
- If you are an existing Virtual Stock Exchange member, enter your Email address and Password in the login panel and get set to trade. If you are a new user, follow the link to register - it's easy!
- Follow the instructions and start trading!
Join now, and see if you can win my STOCK-O-MANIA competition! The more participants the higher the level of competition. Can you master the market?
So yeah, there ya go. Just enter that password to join. K, see ya!
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
I'm convinced there's global cooling going on! This morning here in Logan the weather didn't seem so bad. Now... tell me if I'm wrong, but usually it seems like the weather gets warmer throughout the day... no? Like normally the morning is coldest, around noon it's a bit warmer, and in the afternoon it's warmest. It was warm this morning, a bit cooler at noon, and then the afternoon was COLD! OK, for those of you (weather nerds) like Spencer who see a fault in my logic ("Jeff, it's just a cold front moving in,") you can just be quiet. It's global cooling! Either way, this sho' ain't spring.
Lost is the best TV show I've ever seen. It's got a little of everything I could want in a TV show. First of all, it's high quality. While the special effects aren't always movie quality, it genuinely feels like a movie the majority of the time. It has tons of mystery. It has the required dosage of drama. It can make you laugh. I confess I have semi-teared up on at least one occasion, and it's very cerebral. But if you aren't into cerebral, you don't have to think if you don't want to. It's got something for everyone. It is officially my favorite TV show ever.
Self-checkout further isolates members of society from one another. It seems to me that in the average person's day the only stranger they may be forced to talk to is the cashier at their local grocer or at other stores. As if texting and social networking sites hadn't isolated us enough, we now don't even talk to cashiers! We have self-checkout! I wonder if we'll get to the point where you will be a bizare and strange individual if you even speak to anyone other than family and the closest of friends. It seems we may be on that path. Or I might just be overanalyzing self-checkout so that I have something to fill in for this the third and final wEDNESDAY tHOUGHT for today. You decide.
Monday, April 13, 2009
I'm pretty shocked because I keep seeing job postings for bloggers! I think it's crazy that someone could get paid to do this stuff! Anyway, I still am not sure what I'm doing for my summer job. If anyone has any last minute AWESOME ideas I'm totally down. Feel free to help me out!
Ugh, I had to open my bedroom window because there's some strange chemically-smell coming from elsewhere in my apartment, but the down-side is that there is a MASSIVE flock of seagulls (not this Flock of Seagulls)
flying around Old Main Hill from the Easter Egg Roll that took place there yesterday. (I was actually a part of it!) My friend Kelsie let me come to her family shindig yesterday and the day before. I got to color eggs, and then yesterday we rolled/threw/fought with the eggs on the hill. It was fun, but I didn't really enjoy being covered in hard-boiled egg stuff. Thanks KELS!
Anyway, I hate that my summer is still up in the air. I really want to find a job and know what I'll be doing. While I do think this blog is a winner, I doubt it's going to make the cash I'll need for school next year. It also doesn't help that I'm anxious about finals, huge term papers, and studying for the LSAT. I know I'll be able to handle all of it, but I'm just a bit worried as usual.
Well, that's all. K bye.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Can I just say that I'm REALLY grateful for American hospitals and medical technology? How crazy is this... apparently some lady in Albania had a bullet in her cheek for 12 YEARS that she didn't know was in there. The doctor had told her that it had come out when she was shot in her sleep. Here's an excerpt from the article on BBC News:
"An Albanian woman shot in her sleep in 1997 lived for 12 years with a bullet lodged in her cheek without knowing it until it showed up on an X-ray.
Mrike Rrucaj was injured while lying in bed at a time of civil strife in Albania in 1997.
But doctors told her the bullet passed straight through her cheek and simply patched up her wound.
The truth was discovered a week ago when she collapsed in pain, and the 2.8cm-long bullet was eventually found."
Not only am I blessed for living in a country where I can get the best medical attention possible, but I'm also blessed to live in a country where I don't run a high risk of being a victim of violence in the first place.
While I'm on this subject... I was at work the other night thinking about what a blessing my job is. Sure I'm making pretty close to minimum wage and can only work a few hours a week, but according to a report by The Independent Institute an average hourly wage that "compare[s] favorably with the average standard of living" in Bangladesh is 13¢ an hour! They have difficult sweatshop-labor jobs, too. I just have to answer questions, swipe cards, and grab printouts a few times an hour. It would take a person in Bangladesh about 57 hours of tough monotonous labor to earn what I get in an HOUR! I hope I remember this the second I think to ever complain about my pay, hours, or how boring my job is.
Anyway, just reminders of blessings I should count every day. K... see ya.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
I think I can actually do it! I've had my doubts off and on about whether I'd be able to hack law school, the LSAT... all of it. It's kind of a scary thing. However, I've finally realized that it's just more school! I know school! I know how to find a way to succeed in school! Ok, for those of you saying, "This is different, it's law school," I fully realize that, but I figure if Keith Barton can do it, so can I! I was looking at last year's class accepted to BYU LAW and I'd fit into the above average category on GPA. Anyway, I've finally decided that it's not something I hope to survive, I hope that when I survive I survive with flying colors!
I think I'm a great artist.
My good pal Amelia recently discovered this WONDERFUL piece of art in an old notebook of hers. I can't shake the feeling that whoever drew this back in 2004 went on to become a world-renowned artist/millionaire. Ok, actually I drew this. I honestly have no idea what it was about. I think there must have been some inside joke surrounding the "ladywooingariffic" qualities of the gentleman above, who is apparently me? Also apparent are the facts that my daddy can beat up your daddy, and I'm good at streetball. Possibly I'm a terrorist what with the bomb in my hand? You decide what to do with this. Mock, laugh, dismiss. Whatever!
I really do enjoy making idiotic movies. Though my KAVE TV days are long over, I still enjoy making completely random movies for my classes when I get those assignments. I think it's fun. The following doesn't represent my finest piece to be sure, but I still had a lot of fun making it. ENJOY ¡ESPOSAS POR CORREO!
Monday, April 6, 2009
10: I don't know about you, but if Jason Bourne was giving me advice... I'D LISTEN!
9: (For Griff) If someone's giving you an offering of shortbread, do NOT trust them if they don't also provide something to drink.
8: How does McDonald's know that I only love onions when they're in tiny little cubes!?
7: I wore hot pink pants today.
5: I think I wish that the volcano would have just swallowed Joe.
4: Use your Mollisols wisely!
3: Will Donald Trump's toupee ever crawl away?
2: Cadbury Creme Egg's are WAY better than people give them credit for.
1: Oh! I get it! It's a countdown.
Saturday, April 4, 2009
The second reunion: Gregory is back. I picked up my poor lonely car on the way home. Good stuff. Woot again.
Sorry, nothing too exciting to talk about. K, bye.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
It should probably stop snowing now. I know that I said last Wednesday that I was actually glad it was snowing... but I'm done being glad. I want my car back! It's still stuck in Layton. I'm quite tired of the snow, and I still have spring fever anyway, so bring back the good weather so I can at least be warm while I'm distracted.
Land-lines seem old. It's funny how land-line telephones seem REALLY REALLY out-dated to me. I think kids may start to look at them the same way my dad looked at his first cell phone. It's funny how quickly technology can change your perspective on things.
If we paid people to quit smoking I wonder if we'd save more people from cancer than we have from funding cancer research. I'm not actually suggesting we do this, but this was the thought I had as I just walked to work. I saw a couple that were both smoking and just as they passed me I heard part of one of their sentences. I heard, "...doing research with the Huntsman Cancer Institute..." It really irked me that someone could care enough about cancer to be talking about it, and yet could be sticking a cancer-stick in their mouths! According to the National Cancer Institute, "Cigarette smoking alone is directly responsible for approximately 30 percent of all cancer deaths annually in the United States." This would mean that of the 559,312 cancer-related deaths in 2008, about 167,793 of them could have been prevented by people quitting smoking. Stop smoking!