Tuesday, November 17, 2009


The title of this post is both my topic, and the name of a VERY fun game that I played this last weekend with some friends. 

First:  TODAY
Today was a decent day.  I didn't get some things done that I was supposed to because I couldn't get work off.  That was just a little frustrating.  Then I did get off of work a little early thanks to a very kind co-worker.  I quickly grabbed dinner and then went to the Quinney Library Computer Lab on campus.  I only had a couple hours to get some work done on my GIS (Geographic information systems a.k.a map-making) projects that I'm INSANELY behind on from having the swiggity flizzle.  I was trying to get as much done as possible before the lab closed.  I planned to be there from 5-7.  Then after about an hour people all left the lab.  Then the lights went out.  I was alone in there working by the light of the solo light that stays lit.  Finally a girl that works for the library came and said, "You know we're closing right?"  I looked at the clock and it was only 6:15.  "You don't close at 7:00?"  Apparently the library changed their hours in the last week.  After she was done giving me the bad news, I may or may not... mostly may... have cursed.  It was the first time I've heard myself swear in over a year as far as I can remember.  (The last time I foolishly pulled out in front of someone in my car.)


(This is a story I don't think my family has ever even heard.)  In sixth grade there was a point where I didn't have any good friends.  I wanted very badly to change this.  On Halloween I put a plan into motion to do just that.  I was trick or treating with my good pal Xavier.  He and I were cruising down the street and we heard an older guy across the street use a swear word.  Xavier turned to me and said, "Did you hear what he said?!"  Seizing the opportunity, I said, "Yeah, he said H***," as matter-of-factly as I could.  (Wow, I found a great source for cool-lessons in that random dude on the street.)  Xavier was CLEARLY impressed and laughed about me using the curse word.  When I saw the reaction I got, the idea was solidified.  Soon afterword I played football with Juan and Alex at recess.  I casually included some colorful language.  They thought it was so cool!  Then I started hanging out with Juan a lot.  Alex would frequently join in, too.  Our friendship was almost based entirely on the fact that we called each other profane names and swore frequently.  My word of choice started with a "b" and ended in "tard."  I was friends with them for the majority of the school year.  Then, not surprisingly for a relationship based on rebellion, things came crashing down.  I should point out that all the while my family was nonethewiser to my cursing.  All the kids at school knew, but not my fam.  Finally my family was having a party and my sister and I decided to weigh ourselves.  She went first, and then when I got on the scale it only said low battery and wouldn't work.  I went to tell her and only meant to tease her about having used the last of the battery, but I accidently let my favorite word slip... oops.  She called me out on it and I blatantly lied and said that I didn't say that word.  Soon after that I had a falling out with Juan.  Swearing to impress people had earned me a couple friends, but trust me, they weren't really winners.  One of our favorite pass-times was chasing each other and slapping each other on the back of the head.  Hard.  It hurt.  I probably lost a quarter of my brain cells.  Turns out that swearing to make friends ain't such a grand idea.  I pretty much quit after that.  I now probably let fly about .4 swear-words a year.  Not my cup of tea anymore.  Besides, I think all that head-slapping made me forget all my favorite swears.

K, see ya.


  1. Hmmm. Though I don't condone the use of swearing in order to gain friends, I do think you had good taste in curse words. That particularly word is hilarious to me, and I don't know why....

    Good luck with getting stuff done. Ha ha. And my favorite sentence of the day is "I was alone in there working by the light of the solo light that stays lit."

  2. you know, the game Curses and you will forever be linked in my memory. you remind me of it and it reminds me of you. (mostly the latter, though. you also remind me of a lot of other things, not just silly games.)

    i could make a very similar statement about So I Married an Ax-Murderer. you remind me of it and even moreso, it reminds me of you.